My Mother is Running Wild All Over Facebook

Or, isn't it weird when your mother "friends" your friends?  

Yesterday was K.'s 2nd birthday.  A shocking thing, really.  I can't believe we've managed to raise a reasonably well-adjusted 2yr old.  

I am such an emotional wreck with these hormones.  K. is doing so well at his new daycare, and the fact that it allows us to have some low-key time together in the morning is so worth making the change.  Even just doing mundane things, getting dressed, brushing teeth, but in an unhurried way, feels precious and enjoyable to me.  And then I dropped him off at daycare - mind you - most of the work that I'm doing today is from home, somehow that makes it harder to drop him off since I don't have somewhere to BE.  And he went straight to the sandbox and happily began to play, hardly looking up when I kissed the top of his head.  I just felt so emotional.  I can see how important this social experience is for him, yet there is a part of me that just wants to keep him at home and not work.  I suppose when business picks up I will feel more gratified by working.  

I'm freaking out a bit that when the new baby comes I will be faced with the stark choice to work full-time or stay at home full-time.  I don't think that part-time work will cover even the cost of p/t daycare for two.  This is worrisome to me.  I have lots of time to figure it out.  I just feel so torn between wanting to spend all the moments together while he is still so little and needs and loves me so much, but also wanting to keep something for myself, so that when he/they don't need me anymore, I will still have, well, an identity apart from that of "Mom".  

resurrection

I've decided to try to resurrect this blog because, well, I'm pregnant again and it's good to have a place to blab on about things in that condition.

Seven weeks and a hormonal mess of nausea and exhaustion AND weaning the almost-two-year-old just to throw in another body chemistry disaster.  Oh, yes, and the week long visit from the estranged (from each other) parental units.  I talked to an old friend today who suggested that I go see a reiki practitioner to get all the negative energy cleansed out of my system.  It might not be a bad idea.  

Little K. is doing great, notwithstanding the weaning.  He's obsessed with music and listens to the classical radio station with me demanding:  "Mommy, what that instrument is???"  He carries a ladle around the house, blows on it and insists that it's a trumpet.  This obsession is more entertaining to me than the previous motor vehicle obsession.  He is also in the habit of waking up and announcing, "Daddy, I love you too much."  He's gotten "too much" confused with "so much" but it sounds too cute to discourage it.

The cats both had fleas and we had to de-flea the entire house.  That was disgusting.  We didn't even know they were infested because I guess you just don't catch fleas in the city but apparently when you move out to the country you do.

I'm totally freaked out that after I have baby number two I will not be able to travel for a long time because of money and the difficulty that I imagine traveling solo with an infant and a toddler would bring.  My frugal husbad also insists that we only have enough money to make TWO trips before the baby is born.  This sucks.  I have a fantasy that if I go on a financial diet and spend NO ABSOLUTELY NO extraneous money that I can increase this, but we are already so frugal that I'm not sure how much more frugal things can get around here.   Also, what do I cut out?  Don't buy maternity clothes?  Don't ever go out to dinner or to a movie with my husband?  Don't get netflix?  Don't ever go to a yoga class?  Don't buy new shoes even when the old ones are embarrassing?  These are not lavish expenditures, I think.

And there you have it.