First Baby Dream
Well, as we walked romantically on the beach last weekend, Derek and I also hashed out our decision about when to start trying to have a baby. (gulp)
I was really happy about this because I have loads of anxiety about it, as I do with anything that I haven't done before and don't know if I'll really be able to do.
Which led to last night, and the appearance of my first (oh but surely not to be the last) baby anxiety dream.
I had a baby, but really I wasn't ready to have a baby. I was ambivalent, couldn't believe the baby was really mine, and kept leaving the baby with random others at a picnic. The baby was only one day old, but I couldn't breast feed. I tried and tried, but barely any milk at all would come out of my breasts. The baby would latch on, no problem, but only a tiny bit of milk would trickle out. I had nothing to give the baby. I was afraid the baby would die. I was unable to breast feed and couldn't figure out where to by formula. I was afraid that I would have to watch the baby grow weak and die, so I kept leaving the baby at the picnic.
I was really happy about this because I have loads of anxiety about it, as I do with anything that I haven't done before and don't know if I'll really be able to do.
Which led to last night, and the appearance of my first (oh but surely not to be the last) baby anxiety dream.
I had a baby, but really I wasn't ready to have a baby. I was ambivalent, couldn't believe the baby was really mine, and kept leaving the baby with random others at a picnic. The baby was only one day old, but I couldn't breast feed. I tried and tried, but barely any milk at all would come out of my breasts. The baby would latch on, no problem, but only a tiny bit of milk would trickle out. I had nothing to give the baby. I was afraid the baby would die. I was unable to breast feed and couldn't figure out where to by formula. I was afraid that I would have to watch the baby grow weak and die, so I kept leaving the baby at the picnic.
posted by Melissa at 11:04 PM
4 Comments:
That's awful, Liss. Don't worry - you have *everything* to give a baby.
This does make me laugh, though, because yesterday as I was writing groceriy lists for Thenksgiving stuff and came across the place where I had written down my craziest baby dream ever, the one where Asia had a baby and had that giant breast and was feeding my cousin Sarah's baby. Nat read the whole thing out loud and we were CRYING laughing. I will post it for a good laugh again soon.
i only had one giant breast?
when are you starting to try? what was the verdict?
I'll get to Asia's question later, but first I want to tell you that when I initially found out that D was pregnant, I dreamt that she had a preemie baby that was actually a worm, and would go around breastfeeding the little worm. eeeewwwwww.
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